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The problem with living by our feelings

As soon as one thing goes your way, you feel temporarily content, but just around the corner is that next thing to cause you discontentment. If you want short term happiness, go ahead and let outside people and circumstances make you happy? That may be okay for a while, but if you want true happiness, it is time to look within and to understand your thought patterns. People and places no longer need to change in order for you to be happy. Instead cultivate an attitude of joy, interest, contentment, creativity, and growth.
I am a huge fan of cognitive behavioral therapy for eating disorders, because it encourages us not to be swayed by every emotion that comes our way, but to choose to deal with our thoughts in intentional ways. Sherry Graba is a lovely counselor I adore and she has these thoughts from her blog today:
How to do you cultivate these positive emotions?
1. Notice your positive emotions throughout the day. Write them down and label them, “Gratitude”, “Serenity,” “Confidence.”
2. Notice what your thoughts were when you were experiencing these positive emotions.
3. Notice what is happening in your body when these positive emotions surface? Do you feel expansive? Are your shoulders lifted?
The more you notice these positive emotions, the more often you will begin feeling them. As you begin to feel more positive, negative emotions may erupt, but they will not take up as much energy as they once did.
Sherry Gaba, LCSW is a Psychotherapist and Life Coach in Agoura Hills. She specializes in addictions, trauma, depression, anxiety, divorce, single parenting, and helping her clients find their purpose. She is the Psychotherapist on Celebrity Rehab 2 and 3 and her book “The Law of Sobriety” will be out in September 2010. She can be reached at,