Escaping Control: Jen's Recovery Story, Part II
This two-part article was written exclusively for EatingDisordersOnline.com by Jenmac18, a member of SupportGroups.com. In this article, Jen discusses how her eating disorder began due to the pressures her father put on her and what has finally helped her overcome anorexia.
I followed my meal plan for a few days, but because of my depression and anxiety I started to restrict. Since my time in the inpatient program in 2007 I lost those 15 pounds I had gained, and then gained an additional five pounds on top of that. Now I rarely have bulimic tendencies, but I still have problems with counting calories, weighing myself and measuring my food.
Finding the Right Therapist
I have been to a few therapists, but I never stay long enough. I think that at the time I was not ready to get rid of my disease. Currently I'm proud to say that I gained eight pounds in two months all by myself. I think what pushed me to gain weight was when my doctor wanted me to see an oncologist because my white blood cell count was extremely low. I also had a lot of bruising on my legs, I was feeling very weak, and I had problems with my inner left ear.
When I went to see her, she didn't do any tests on me, she took one look at me and told me that all I needed was to gain 10 pounds in a month. The doctor was convinced that all of my symptoms would disappear if I did. She wanted me to promise her I'd do that. She told me that she wanted to see me back in her office in four weeks with my extra padding. I think her concern for me, and belief that my symptoms would go away, was the kick in the butt that I needed.
Regaining Weight and Health
Sure enough after gaining some weight, I no longer felt weak and my ear problem and the bruising had disappeared. I still need to gain more weight, but just knowing that this made a difference in my health, gave me hope and strength. I still count calories, weight myself and measure my food, but I am gaining weight now. I just recently went to my first therapy appointment with a therapist that specializes in eating disorders. I'm heading in the right direction.
I have had this disorder for 17 years, but there is hope. I can't believe how this illness just takes control of you. If you've had an eating disorder for just a short while I highly recommend you seek help now, because the longer you wait the harder it will be to tackle later on. If you've had it a while, trust me you can definitely overcome it. I will pray for all of you struggling. We all need to have hope. Let's try to recover together. Never give up!